An estimated 6.9 million Americans aged 65 and older are living with Alzheimer's dementia, a number that is projected to rise significantly. This statistic underscores the growing need for guidance on how can I get help with my mother who has dementia, and finding the right support is a crucial step for both you and your family.
Understanding the Need for Assistance
Recognizing that a parent needs help is the first step toward creating a sustainable care plan. Dementia is a progressive disease, meaning care needs will increase over time. Signs that indicate a need for help may include:
- Increasing safety risks: Leaving the stove on, wandering, or forgetting to take medication.
- Decline in hygiene: Inability to manage bathing, dressing, or grooming.
- Behavioral changes: Increased agitation, confusion, or withdrawal.
- Caregiver burnout: Feeling overwhelmed, stressed, or isolated from caregiving demands.
Acting proactively not only protects your mother but also safeguards your own well-being. The support options available range from local community resources to professional in-home and long-term residential care.
Exploring Types of Professional Care
There are many levels of professional care designed to meet varying needs as dementia progresses. The right choice depends on your mother's specific symptoms, the level of supervision required, and your family's financial situation.
1. In-Home Care
In-home care allows your mother to remain in familiar surroundings, which can be comforting and reduce confusion. This option provides assistance with daily living activities and can be a good fit for early to mid-stage dementia.
- Home Health Aides: These professionals assist with personal care tasks like bathing, dressing, and mobility. They may also help with light housekeeping and meal preparation.
- Skilled Home Health Care: This type of care is for temporary, medically-necessary needs prescribed by a doctor, such as wound care or physical therapy.
- Companion Care: Companions provide non-medical supervision and socialization, offering a needed break for family caregivers.
2. Adult Day Care
Adult day care centers provide a safe, structured environment with social activities and supervision during the day. This is an excellent option for caregivers who work or need regular respite. These centers often offer meals, transportation, and engaging activities tailored for individuals with dementia.
3. Residential Care Facilities
As dementia advances, 24/7 care may become necessary. Residential facilities provide round-the-clock supervision and specialized care.
- Assisted Living with Memory Care: Many assisted living facilities have dedicated memory care units or “neighborhoods.” Staff in these units are specifically trained in dementia care and the environment is designed for safety, with alarmed doors and secure outdoor areas.
- Skilled Nursing Facilities (Nursing Homes): These provide the highest level of medical care and supervision for advanced stages of dementia.
- Continuing Care Retirement Communities (CCRCs): These offer a continuum of care levels, allowing a resident to transition from independent living to assisted living or skilled nursing as needed.
Comparing Care Options for Your Mother
To make an informed decision, it is helpful to compare the different care options based on cost, intensity of care, and environment.
| Feature | In-Home Care | Adult Day Care | Memory Care Facility |
|---|---|---|---|
| Cost | Hourly rate, varies widely. Can be expensive for round-the-clock care. | Per day or hourly rate. Generally less expensive than residential care. | Can be very expensive; often includes room and board, plus specialized care. |
| Intensity of Care | Flexible, can range from a few hours of companionship to full-time medical assistance. | Day supervision, structure, and activities. Not for overnight needs. | 24/7 supervision and intensive, specialized care. High staff-to-resident ratio. |
| Environment | Stays in familiar home environment. | Community setting, social interaction with peers. | Secure, residential setting designed for safety and routine. |
| Key Benefit | Comfort of home, personalized attention. | Caregiver respite, socialization for the person with dementia. | Highest level of secure, specialized care. |
Accessing Financial and Legal Assistance
Navigating the financial and legal aspects of dementia care can be daunting. Planning ahead is vital to secure the best possible care for your mother.
Financial Support
- Medicare: Primarily covers short-term, acute care needs. It does not cover long-term custodial care in a facility but may cover some home health services and hospice care.
- Medicaid: A state and federal program for low-income individuals. It is the largest single payer for long-term care in the U.S. and can cover nursing home costs for eligible individuals.
- Veterans' Benefits: The VA offers various programs and pensions for eligible veterans and their spouses, including assistance for long-term care. This can be a significant resource.
- Long-Term Care Insurance: If your mother purchased a policy before her diagnosis, it could cover a portion of memory care expenses.
- Personal Assets and Savings: Many families use a combination of personal income, retirement funds, and leveraging home equity to cover costs.
Legal Planning
Early legal planning, while your mother can still participate, is essential.
- Power of Attorney: Designating a trusted person to make financial or health care decisions. A durable power of attorney takes effect immediately, while a springing power of attorney activates upon incapacitation.
- Advance Directives: Including a living will to specify your mother's wishes regarding medical treatment.
- Wills and Trusts: Ensuring her estate is in order for the future.
Finding Caregiver Support
Caring for a loved one with dementia is a demanding role, and caregiver burnout is a serious risk. It is critical to find support for yourself as well.
- Support Groups: Joining a support group, either in-person or online, connects you with others facing similar challenges. Sharing experiences and advice can be incredibly therapeutic.
- Respite Care: Short-term relief care provides a much-needed break. This can range from in-home care for a few hours to a short stay in a residential facility.
- Counseling: Speaking with a therapist or counselor can help you process the difficult emotions that come with caregiving.
- Educational Programs: Organizations like the Alzheimer's Association offer workshops and educational resources to help caregivers understand the disease and develop coping strategies.
A Plan for Moving Forward
Navigating the complex world of dementia care requires a thoughtful, step-by-step approach. Start by assessing your mother's immediate needs and your family's resources. Don't be afraid to ask for help—not just for your mother, but for yourself. Building a network of professional and personal support will empower you to provide the best possible care while protecting your own well-being.
A great starting point is the Eldercare Locator, a public service connecting you to local Area Agencies on Aging that provide information and services.
To find a local Area Agency on Aging, visit the Eldercare Locator website here: https://eldercare.acl.gov/.
Conclusion
Finding the right help for your mother who has dementia is a journey involving many resources and adjustments. From exploring in-home care and adult day programs to considering specialized residential facilities and accessing financial aid, a well-thought-out plan provides clarity and reassurance. The most important step is to start gathering information and building your support network, ensuring both your mother's needs and your own are met with compassion and understanding.
