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How do you avoid ageist language in daily conversations?

4 min read

According to the World Health Organization (WHO), ageism can have serious and wide-ranging effects on health and well-being. Learning how do you avoid ageist language is a crucial step toward fostering respectful, positive interactions across all generations, improving relationships and outcomes.

Quick Summary

Shift your perspective and vocabulary to be more inclusive by using person-first language, replacing outdated terms like "elderly" and "senior" with "older adult," and focusing on individual capabilities rather than generalized assumptions. This conscious effort promotes dignity and respectful communication.

Key Points

  • Use Neutral Terminology: Prefer phrases like "older adults," "older people," or "people over 65" instead of "elderly" or "seniors," which can be outdated or carry negative connotations.

  • Adopt Person-First Language: Frame your statements around the person, not their age. For example, say "a person living with dementia" instead of "a demented person" to emphasize their humanity.

  • Avoid Condescending Tones and "Elderspeak": Speak in a normal, respectful tone, avoiding overly simplistic language, exaggerated pitch, or terms of endearment like "sweetie" that can be infantilizing.

  • Challenge Positive and Negative Stereotypes: Recognize that both complimentary phrases like "you look great for your age" and negative assumptions about frailty or tech-savviness are ageist. Focus on an individual's actual capabilities and character.

  • Promote Individualized Descriptions: If age is relevant, use specific details rather than sweeping generalizations. For instance, refer to "people aged 80 to 89" if context requires it, rather than just "the aged."

  • Question the Relevance of Age: Before stating someone's age, consider if it is necessary for the conversation. If not, omit it to avoid reinforcing unnecessary age-based profiling.

In This Article

Understanding Ageism and its Impact

Ageism, or discrimination based on age, can manifest in subtle and overt ways, often through the language we use. This can be harmful, whether it comes from a well-intentioned place or a place of ignorance. Negative stereotypes about aging, such as assumptions of frailty, incompetence, or being out of touch, are frequently perpetuated through our words. The impact of such language is not just an issue of politeness; research has shown a strong link between negative age stereotypes and poor health outcomes, reduced longevity, and lower quality of life for older adults.

The Problem with Common Ageist Phrases

Many ageist terms are so embedded in our daily speech that we may not even realize their negative connotations. Phrases like "still working at their age" or backhanded compliments such as "you look great for your age" imply that aging is a state of decline. Speaking to an older adult in "elderspeak"—a simplified, high-pitched, or condescending tone—can be infantilizing. Instead of celebrating an individual's accomplishments, this type of language reinforces harmful and limiting stereotypes about what is possible at different life stages. Addressing these subtle biases in our communication is a powerful way to promote more respectful interactions.

Practical Steps to Eliminate Ageist Language

Adopting more inclusive language is a proactive process that requires mindful communication. By focusing on person-first language and recognizing the diversity within age groups, you can speak more respectfully. Here are some key strategies:

Use Person-First Language

  • Focus on the individual, not the age. Instead of saying "a group of seniors," opt for "a group of older adults" or "people over 65." This approach emphasizes the individual's humanity rather than defining them by their age.
  • Be specific when necessary. If a person's age is relevant to the conversation, use specific age ranges (e.g., "adults aged 75 to 84") rather than vague, generalizing terms like "the aged."

Replace Outdated and Patronizing Terms

  • Avoid "elderly" and "senior citizen." These terms are often seen as outdated and can carry negative connotations. The Associated Press and the American Medical Association both recommend using "older adults" or "older people" instead.
  • Question necessity. Before mentioning someone's age, consider if it is relevant. For instance, in a story about a long-distance runner, their age may not be a necessary detail unless it directly relates to a record-breaking achievement.
  • Substitute condescending adverbs. Adverbs like "still," as in "he still drives at 85," imply that an activity is unusual or remarkable for that age, suggesting an underlying assumption of decline. Simply state the fact without the loaded adverb.

Acknowledge Diversity and Individuality

  • Recognize varying capabilities. Just as with any other demographic, older adults are not a monolithic group. Avoid making assumptions about an individual's health, cognitive ability, or tech-savviness based on their age. Someone in their 80s may be more active and skilled with technology than someone in their 60s.
  • Challenge positive and negative stereotypes. So-called "positive" ageism, like "age is just a number," can be just as problematic because it dismisses the real challenges and experiences of aging. Strive for honest, respectful communication that doesn't simplify a person's life experiences.

Comparison: Ageist vs. Inclusive Language

Ageist Language Inclusive Language Why the Change is Better
"She's an elderly woman." "She's an older adult." or "The woman in her 80s." Replaces a broad, often negative term with a neutral and respectful descriptor.
"The senior citizens need help." "The older community members need support." Person-first language that avoids othering and emphasizes community inclusion.
"He's still working at 75." "He is a dedicated worker at 75." Removes the implicit surprise that a person of this age would be working.
"The aged population is a burden." "The growing older population presents new societal opportunities." Shifts from a negative, catastrophic framing to a constructive, opportunity-focused one.
"Let me help you, sweetie." "Would you like some assistance with that?" Eliminates patronizing and infantilizing terms of endearment in favor of respectful language.

Reframing Your Perspective

Avoiding ageist language begins with an internal shift in perspective. Recognize your own implicit biases about aging. We are all aging, and the way we speak about older adults can influence our own future perceptions of ourselves. As the World Health Organization points out, ageism affects people of all ages, and is particularly insidious because it can be directed at one's own future self. By changing our narrative today, we can create a more inclusive world for everyone, including ourselves.

Promoting Intergenerational Respect

Effective communication is a two-way street. Practice active listening with older adults, allowing them to express themselves fully without interruption or assumptions. Engage with their perspective and experiences with genuine curiosity and respect. This not only builds better relationships but also broadens your own understanding of different life stages.

Conclusion: Building a More Inclusive Dialogue

Consciously choosing your words to avoid ageist language is a powerful tool for building a more respectful and inclusive society. By shifting away from outdated terminology, challenging implicit biases, and adopting person-first language, we can foster communication that honors the individuality, wisdom, and diverse experiences of older adults. This practice benefits not only the people around us but also our own future selves. It’s a simple change with a profound impact on promoting healthy, dignified aging for all.

Frequently Asked Questions

Ageist language refers to words, phrases, and tones that stereotype, discriminate, or show prejudice against individuals or groups based on their age. This can include condescending speech, outdated terminology, and assumptions about capability tied to a person's age.

The term 'elderly' is often considered outdated and is associated with negative stereotypes such as frailty and dependence. Inclusive communication guidelines recommend using more neutral, person-first terms like 'older adult' or 'older person' to avoid generalizing and to show more respect.

Yes, for many people, "senior citizen" is a formal yet equally outdated term that can create an 'us versus them' dynamic. Experts on inclusive language suggest using "older adult" or specifying a person's age range for clarity and respect.

To avoid being condescending, maintain a normal, respectful tone of voice and avoid "elderspeak"—simplified language or exaggerated pitch. Engage them as capable adults, make eye contact, and listen actively to their contributions to the conversation.

Person-first language emphasizes the individual over a defining characteristic. In the context of age, this means saying "older adult" instead of "the aged." This practice honors the person's identity beyond their age and counters dehumanizing stereotypes.

If you hear ageist language, you can gently correct the person by suggesting more inclusive terms. For example, you might say, "I've heard that 'older adult' is a more respectful term than 'elderly,'" without making them feel defensive. Focusing on education rather than accusation is more effective.

Yes, ageism can apply to any age group. Avoiding ageist language means not making assumptions or using stereotypes for young people as well. The goal is respectful, individualized communication with people of all ages.

References

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Medical Disclaimer

This content is for informational purposes only and should not replace professional medical advice. Always consult a qualified healthcare provider regarding personal health decisions.