How to tell if mom has dementia? A guide for family caregivers

Dementia affects nearly 55 million people worldwide, with a new case being diagnosed every few seconds. When a parent, like your mom, starts exhibiting concerning behaviors, it's natural to wonder, "How to tell if mom has dementia?" This guide provides an authoritative overview of the key signs to help you understand the changes you are observing.

Quick Summary

Recognizing dementia in a parent involves observing persistent changes in memory, thinking, behavior, and judgment that disrupt daily life, distinguishing them from typical age-related changes. Documenting specific incidents can provide crucial information for a medical professional's evaluation, which is the necessary next step.

Key Points

• Differentiate Normal vs. Dementia: Occasional forgetfulness is normal, but persistent memory loss and struggles with everyday tasks signal potential dementia.

• Document Everything: Keeping a detailed log of your mom's behaviors and cognitive slips is vital for providing a medical professional with a clear picture.

• Recognize Key Symptoms: Watch for more than just memory loss. Changes in judgment, mood, communication, and problem-solving are crucial indicators.

• Consult a Professional Early: An early diagnosis from a doctor is the most important step, as it can help rule out other conditions and allow for better management and planning.

• Prepare for Difficult Conversations: Talking to a parent about potential cognitive decline requires empathy and patience. Focus on concern for their well-being rather than pointing out their mistakes.

• Educate Yourself on Dementia Types: While a doctor will diagnose the specific type, understanding the differences between common dementias like Alzheimer's, Vascular, and Lewy Body can help you prepare.

Understanding the difference between normal aging and dementia

Many people worry about cognitive changes as they or their parents get older. It's important to differentiate between typical, mild aging-related forgetfulness and the more severe cognitive decline indicative of dementia. Forgetting a name or where you put your keys occasionally is a normal part of aging. In contrast, a person with dementia might struggle with tasks they have performed their whole life or forget what a key is for. The key distinction lies in whether the changes disrupt daily living and function. Normal aging might cause temporary confusion, but dementia leads to long-term impairment.

Ten warning signs of dementia to observe

Being aware of the specific signs can help you identify a potential problem early. The following are among the most common indicators that may signal the onset of dementia in your mother:

1. Memory loss that disrupts daily life: Forgetting recently learned information is a hallmark. This might involve repeatedly asking the same questions or increasingly relying on memory aids or family members for reminders.
2. Challenges in planning or solving problems: Struggles with tasks that require planning and organization, such as following a familiar recipe, paying bills, or managing a monthly budget, can be a major red flag.
3. Difficulty completing familiar tasks: Individuals may find it hard to complete everyday activities, such as driving to a familiar location, managing a grocery list, or remembering the rules of a favorite game.
4. Confusion with time or place: Losing track of dates, seasons, or the passage of time is common. They may forget where they are or how they got there.
5. Trouble understanding visual images and spatial relationships: Vision changes not due to age can be a symptom. This can cause difficulty with balance, reading, or judging distance.
6. New problems with words in speaking or writing: People with dementia may struggle to follow or join a conversation. They might stop abruptly, forget how to continue, or struggle with vocabulary, calling familiar objects by the wrong name.
7. Misplacing things and losing the ability to retrace steps: Putting items in unusual places (like keys in the freezer) and being unable to retrace their steps to find them is a common sign. They might accuse others of stealing.
8. Decreased or poor judgment: This can manifest in poor financial decisions, such as falling for scams, or neglect of personal grooming and hygiene.
9. Withdrawal from work or social activities: Due to changes in their abilities and challenges in holding conversations, they may withdraw from hobbies, social engagements, or other activities they once enjoyed.
10. Changes in mood and personality: They might become confused, suspicious, depressed, fearful, or anxious. They may be easily upset at home or in unfamiliar situations.

What to do if you suspect your mom has dementia

If you observe one or more of these signs, taking action is crucial. An early diagnosis can lead to better management of symptoms and planning for the future. The following steps can help you prepare for a professional evaluation.

• Document your observations: Keep a journal of specific dates, times, and instances of concerning behavior. Include details about what happened, how your mom reacted, and how her abilities have changed. This objective record is invaluable for a doctor.
• Speak with your mother: Approach the conversation with empathy and calm. Frame it around your concern for her health, not a list of her failures. Explain that you want her to get checked out to ensure she remains as healthy as possible. Don’t get into an argument if she resists; revisit the topic later.
• Consult her doctor: Schedule an appointment and, with her permission, explain your concerns. The doctor can conduct a full evaluation, which may include cognitive tests, physical exams, and lab work to rule out other treatable conditions that can mimic dementia, such as vitamin deficiencies or a thyroid issue.

Distinguishing dementia types

While Alzheimer's disease is the most common form of dementia, it's not the only one. Understanding the different types can help you recognize potential symptoms more accurately. A doctor's diagnosis is essential, but being aware of the general characteristics can provide context.

Feature	Alzheimer's Disease	Vascular Dementia	Lewy Body Dementia
Onset	Gradual, slow decline	Often sudden after a stroke	Fluctuating attention and alertness
Primary Symptom	Short-term memory loss	Impaired judgment, planning	Visual hallucinations, sleep problems
Cognitive Decline	Steady, progressive	Step-wise decline	Fluctuating, sometimes rapid
Physical Symptoms	Mild at first	Can be gait disturbances	Tremors, rigidity, stiffness
Progression	Relatively predictable	May plateau then worsen	Significant fluctuations, can be rapid

Supporting your mom after a diagnosis

A dementia diagnosis is life-changing for the entire family. It's crucial to shift from simply observing symptoms to proactive caregiving. Here are ways you can support your mother:

1. Educate yourself: Learn about the specific type of dementia she has, its progression, and what to expect. This knowledge will empower you to provide the best care.
2. Focus on communication: Adapt your communication style. Use clear, simple language and be patient. Avoid challenging her memory or correcting her, as this can cause frustration. Instead, focus on validating her feelings and connecting in the moment.
3. Plan for the future: Early diagnosis provides an opportunity to involve your mother in legal, financial, and healthcare decisions while she is still able. Discuss her wishes for medical care, living arrangements, and other important matters.
4. Create a safe environment: Adjust her living space to prevent falls and other accidents. This can include removing tripping hazards, installing grab bars, and simplifying her surroundings.
5. Seek support: Connect with others who understand your journey. Caregiver support groups offer a vital network for sharing experiences, challenges, and coping strategies. Organizations like the Alzheimer's Association provide resources and support systems for families navigating this disease. You can find invaluable information and support at alz.org.

Conclusion: A proactive approach is best

Navigating the possibility of a parent having dementia is an emotional and challenging journey. By arming yourself with knowledge of the common signs and understanding the necessary next steps, you can move from a place of uncertainty to proactive support. Early detection, professional evaluation, and informed caregiving can significantly impact your mother’s quality of life and help your family prepare for the road ahead. Remember, you are not alone, and many resources are available to help you and your family.

Frequently Asked Questions

What is the very first sign of dementia?

The most common early sign is memory loss that is disruptive to daily life. This is often noticed by a family member rather than the individual and can include forgetting recent events, important dates, or repeating questions.

How can you tell if mom has dementia and not just old age?

The key is the impact on daily function. Typical aging might involve forgetting things occasionally, but dementia involves a persistent decline that makes it difficult to perform everyday tasks, such as managing finances, driving, or cooking.

Can diet affect dementia symptoms?

While diet is not a cure, a healthy diet, such as the Mediterranean diet, can support overall brain health and may help manage some symptoms. It's an important part of a holistic care plan.

Is there a test to find out if my mom has dementia?

There is no single test for dementia. A doctor will conduct a comprehensive evaluation, including a review of medical history, cognitive and neurological exams, lab tests, and possibly brain imaging to rule out other conditions and arrive at a diagnosis.

How can I get my mom to see a doctor about her memory loss?

Approach the conversation with care and sensitivity. Frame the appointment as a general health check-up, mentioning your concerns about overall wellness rather than specifically focusing on dementia. You can also offer to go with her to the appointment for support.

Are mood swings a sign of dementia?

Yes, changes in mood and personality, including mood swings, are a common symptom. People with dementia may experience increased anxiety, depression, fearfulness, or suspicion due to the neurological changes in their brain.

Does dementia appear suddenly?

Most often, no. The most common forms, like Alzheimer's, develop gradually over time. However, vascular dementia can have a more sudden onset, often following a stroke or series of smaller strokes. Any sudden and significant change should be immediately evaluated by a doctor.