Should I get married at 70 years old? Weighing the pros and cons

According to research from the Pew Research Center, roughly half of previously married people over the age of 65 choose to remarry, proving that love can be found at any stage of life. However, deciding should I get married at 70 years old involves more than just emotions; it requires careful consideration of practical matters, too.

Quick Summary

Getting married at 70 is a decision that requires balancing significant emotional benefits, such as companionship and happiness, against complex financial, legal, and family considerations. The right path forward depends on open communication, a clear understanding of personal goals, and proactive planning for the changes that lie ahead.

Key Points

• Emotional Connection: A new marriage can provide deep companionship, combat loneliness, and significantly improve mental and emotional well-being.

• Financial Planning: Carefully assess the financial implications of marriage, including changes to taxes, Social Security benefits, and healthcare costs.

• Legal Documents: Update all estate planning documents, including wills and beneficiary designations, to reflect your wishes and avoid family disputes.

• Family Dynamics: Prepare for new family dynamics and have open conversations with adult children about the marriage and its implications for inheritance.

• Open Communication: Honest and transparent discussions about finances, health, and future goals are essential for a successful late-in-life marriage.

The Emotional and Psychological Benefits of Late-in-Life Love

While the romantic excitement of a new relationship is undeniable, the deeper emotional and psychological benefits are often what make a late-in-life marriage so rewarding. Companionship is one of the most powerful motivators, helping to combat loneliness and social isolation, which can significantly impact a senior's well-being. In a committed partnership, individuals find a consistent source of emotional support, helping them navigate the challenges that often come with aging, from health issues to the loss of friends. The sense of belonging and purpose that a loving relationship provides can foster a more positive outlook on life, boosting self-esteem and happiness.

Beyond companionship, a new marriage can create shared experiences and new traditions. Whether traveling, exploring hobbies, or simply enjoying daily routines together, these shared moments enrich life and create new memories. A strong, happy marriage has also been linked to better physical and mental health outcomes, including lower rates of depression and improved medical treatment outcomes. Partners often motivate each other to maintain healthy habits, from exercising more to eating better, which can contribute to a longer "health span". Ultimately, a late-in-life marriage affirms life's possibilities and can lead to a more fulfilling retirement.

Navigating the Financial Maze: What Changes at 70?

For couples marrying later in life, financial decisions are often more complex than for younger couples. Both partners likely have accumulated assets, debts, and established financial management styles. Communication is key to navigating this new landscape.

Potential Financial Benefits

• Increased Household Income: Combining incomes and assets can create a healthier financial cushion for retirement, potentially increasing buying power and flexibility for travel or leisure activities.
• Social Security Spousal Benefits: A married person can claim up to 50% of their spouse's Social Security benefit, or their own, whichever is greater. A surviving spouse can receive 100% of their deceased spouse's benefit.
• Insurance Savings: Combining insurance policies, such as auto or homeowners, can sometimes lead to more favorable rates.
• Estate Tax Exclusions: Married couples can leave an unlimited amount of assets to their spouse without incurring estate taxes.

Potential Financial Drawbacks

• Higher Tax Bracket: Your combined income could push you into a higher tax bracket, potentially triggering the "marriage penalty".
• Loss of Survivor Benefits: Remarrying can cause the loss of survivor Social Security benefits from a previous marriage.
• Increased Medical Costs: Higher combined income can lead to higher Medicare premiums. Furthermore, if one spouse requires long-term care and needs Medicaid, combining assets could disqualify them.
• Debt Responsibility: While you are not responsible for pre-existing debts, poor financial management by a spouse could indirectly impact you. Open discussion about finances is essential.

Legal and Estate Planning Considerations

Before getting married, it's critical to update all legal and estate planning documents to reflect your wishes. Neglecting this step can cause significant complications for your new spouse and existing family members, especially children from a previous marriage.

Key Actions to Take

1. Consider a Prenuptial Agreement: A prenup is not just for the young. It's a practical tool for senior couples to protect assets and clarify financial responsibilities, preventing future disputes.
2. Update Your Will and Trust: Revise your will to specify who inherits your assets. If you have a trust, ensure it is updated as well. Failure to do so can lead to unintended beneficiaries, as your new spouse may have inheritance rights under state law.
3. Review Beneficiary Designations: Check all beneficiary designations on retirement accounts, life insurance policies, and other financial products. These designations override your will, so it's vital they are current.
4. Consider Life Estates: If one partner owns a home and wants their children to inherit it, they can grant a “life estate” to the new spouse, allowing them to live in the home for life while preserving the inheritance for the children.

For more information on the legal aspects of late-life relationships, a useful resource can be found at WealthCounsel: Romance in Retirement: When Seniors Remarry.

Blending Families: New Dynamics and Old Relationships

Remarrying at 70 often means bringing together two families with adult children and possibly grandchildren. This can create new dynamics and potential tensions. Communication is crucial not only between partners but also with adult children, who may have expectations about their inheritance or a different vision for their parent's future.

Comparison: Marriage vs. Cohabitation in Later Life

Feature	Marriage	Cohabitation	Key Differences for Seniors
Legal Status	Legally recognized contract with rights and obligations.	No legal status; fewer automatic rights.	Marriage confers automatic inheritance and healthcare rights.
Financial Impact	Potential tax advantages/penalties, impact on Social Security and Medicaid.	Fewer financial impacts, preserves financial independence.	Cohabitation avoids complicated asset merging and tax issues.
Estate Planning	Explicitly impacts inheritance rights, requires updating wills and beneficiaries.	Simplifies inheritance, assets pass directly to named beneficiaries.	Cohabitation minimizes potential inheritance conflicts with adult children.
Emotional Perception	Symbol of deep commitment and security.	Less formal, may be perceived differently by family members.	Both can offer companionship, but marriage is seen as a more formal bond.
Health Benefits	Access to spousal insurance and documented health benefits from companionship.	Companionship still offers health benefits, but fewer legal protections.	Marriage offers more formal benefits like health insurance, but cohabitation provides similar emotional support.

Making the Decision: A Personal Choice

The decision to get married at 70 is deeply personal. It's not about what society expects, but about what you and your partner want for your lives. By openly discussing emotions, finances, legal matters, and family expectations, you can make an informed choice that feels right for you both. Whether you choose to marry or cohabitate, the goal is to find happiness and companionship that enriches your golden years.

Ultimately, the key is to prioritize what matters most to you in this new chapter. Consider your individual and shared goals, communicate openly with your partner and family, and seek professional advice to navigate the complexities. The journey itself, filled with love and thoughtful preparation, is what makes the experience truly special.

Frequently Asked Questions

Will I lose my Social Security benefits if I get married at 70?

It depends on the type of benefit you receive. If you are collecting a survivor benefit from a deceased spouse, remarrying will likely cause you to lose that benefit. However, if you are collecting your own retirement benefit, it will not be affected. It is crucial to check with the Social Security Administration for your specific situation.

Is a prenuptial agreement necessary for a late-in-life marriage?

While not always necessary, a prenup is often a wise choice for older couples. It can protect assets, outline financial responsibilities, and help prevent conflicts, especially if you have children from previous marriages.

How does getting married at 70 affect my estate plan?

Marriage can significantly impact your estate plan. Without proper updates, your new spouse may have legal rights to your assets, potentially overriding your intentions for your children. You must update your will, trusts, and beneficiary designations.

What are the health benefits of marrying at an older age?

Studies suggest that a happy marriage can improve physical and psychological health. Companionship reduces loneliness and stress, and partners can encourage each other to maintain healthy habits, contributing to a longer, healthier life.

How should I talk to my adult children about my new marriage?

Approach the conversation with transparency and honesty. Explain your reasons for remarrying, address their potential concerns about finances and inheritance, and reassure them of your continued love and commitment.

Should we combine our finances or keep them separate?

There is no single right answer. Many older couples choose a hybrid approach, keeping separate individual accounts while establishing a joint account for shared household expenses. The key is to have an open discussion and reach a mutual agreement.

What is the main difference between cohabitation and marriage for seniors?

The main difference lies in the legal status. Marriage provides automatic legal rights and obligations regarding finances, inheritance, and healthcare, whereas cohabitation does not. Your choice should align with your financial goals, legal protections, and personal comfort.