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How do you refer to a person with dementia? A guide to respectful language

4 min read

According to the World Health Organization, over 55 million people worldwide live with dementia, a condition that is often misunderstood. Knowing how do you refer to a person with dementia using respectful and person-first language is a crucial step toward reducing stigma and treating individuals with dignity.

Quick Summary

This guide provides advice on using respectful, person-first language when discussing people with dementia. It highlights the importance of seeing the individual beyond their diagnosis and suggests appropriate terms while explaining why certain outdated labels are harmful.

Key Points

  • Prioritize Person-First Language: Always put the person before the diagnosis by saying "a person with dementia" rather than "a demented person".

  • Avoid Stigmatizing Labels: Harmful terms like "sufferer," "victim," or "empty shell" should be avoided, as they demean and dehumanize individuals.

  • Emphasize the Individual, Not the Illness: Recognize that the diagnosis does not define a person's entire identity and that they still have a history, personality, and desires.

  • Focus on Abilities, Not Deficits: Frame communication to highlight what the person can still do, not what they have lost, to preserve their sense of self-worth.

  • Promote Accurate and Empathetic Language: Thoughtful word choice helps combat misinformation and stereotypes, fostering a more inclusive public understanding of dementia.

  • Use Simple and Clear Communication: When speaking directly, use straightforward sentences and avoid complex language to reduce confusion.

  • Respect Non-Verbal Cues: Be mindful of tone, body language, and physical contact, which become increasingly important as verbal abilities decline.

  • Offer Simple Choices: To reduce anxiety and frustration, ask yes-or-no questions or offer limited options instead of open-ended questions.

In This Article

Using respectful and empathetic language is fundamental when communicating about a person living with dementia. Person-first language emphasizes the individual's humanity rather than defining them by their medical condition. The words we choose can significantly impact a person's self-esteem and how they are perceived by others. Adopting thoughtful language helps dismantle the stigma and misinformation often associated with dementia.

The importance of person-first language

Person-first language is a communication practice that prioritizes the individual before their diagnosis. For instance, you would say "a person with dementia" instead of "a demented person". This subtle shift in phrasing underscores that the person is a whole human being, not just an illness. Dignity and autonomy are central to this approach, recognizing that a dementia diagnosis is not the defining aspect of a person's life. This is especially important as dementia can manifest differently in every individual, affecting personality, memories, and abilities in unique ways.

Language and stigma

Historical and casual language surrounding dementia has contributed to harmful stereotypes and stigma. Terms like "senile" or "empty shell" reduce individuals to a series of deficits and dismiss their life experiences. Such words can diminish a person's self-worth and create a sense of hopelessness. Respectful language counters these negative narratives by focusing on abilities and promoting a sense of worth and engagement. It's a proactive way to change public perceptions and create a more inclusive environment for people with dementia and their families.

Best practices for respectful communication

When referring to a person with dementia, consider the context and your relationship. While using their name is always the most personal and respectful approach, other phrases are appropriate for general discussion.

  • Name First: Refer to the individual by their name (e.g., "Mary" or "Mr. Johnson").
  • Person Living with Dementia: Use this term to emphasize that the person is still actively living their life.
  • Person with a Diagnosis of Dementia: An accurate, clinical term that separates the individual from the condition.
  • "My dad, who has dementia": A simple, descriptive phrase that is both respectful and informative.

Terms to use vs. terms to avoid

Using the right terminology is vital for maintaining respect and dignity. The table below contrasts helpful language with harmful and outdated phrases.

Respectful Language (Use) Stigmatizing Language (Avoid)
Person with dementia Demented person
Person living with dementia Sufferer, victim, afflicted
Changes in behavior Difficult, aggressive, challenging
Living alongside someone with dementia (for a caregiver) Burden, burden of caring
"Mary, who has Alzheimer's disease" Vacant dement, empty shell
"My father, who is living with dementia" Not all there, fading away

Why avoiding stigmatizing language matters

Using dehumanizing language can have real consequences for individuals with dementia. The Mayo Clinic notes that a dementia diagnosis changes some things, but not everything or all at once. Erasing a person's identity by labeling them with their condition can negatively impact their mental and emotional well-being. This is not merely an issue of political correctness; it is a matter of basic human rights and ethical care.

Moreover, the language we use influences public perceptions of dementia. When media and everyday conversations rely on negative stereotypes, it reinforces myths that hinder understanding and support. By promoting accurate and sensitive language, everyone can help foster an environment where people with dementia feel valued and included.

What to consider when communicating directly

When speaking directly to a person with dementia, communication strategies go beyond vocabulary. They include showing empathy, patience, and focusing on non-verbal cues.

  • Use simple sentences: Keep your language straightforward and clear, as complex sentences can be hard to process.
  • Be an active listener: Maintain eye contact and give your full attention to show that you are engaged and value what they are saying.
  • Validate their feelings: Instead of correcting factual errors, respond to the emotions behind their words. Agreeing with their reality can be more comforting than insisting on your own.
  • Offer simple choices: Provide two clear options rather than open-ended questions that might feel overwhelming.

Conclusion

How you refer to a person with dementia is not a trivial matter; it reflects an attitude of respect and understanding. Adopting person-first language and avoiding stigmatizing terms is essential for protecting the dignity of individuals living with cognitive decline. As dementia awareness grows, so does our responsibility to use language that is accurate, empowering, and inclusive. By focusing on the person—their history, personality, and desires—rather than their diagnosis, we contribute to a more compassionate and informed society. This approach benefits not only the individual with dementia but also their family, friends, and caregivers, creating a more supportive environment for everyone involved.

Visit the Alzheimer's Society for more comprehensive guidelines on communicating respectfully with people with dementia.

Frequently Asked Questions

Using "person with dementia" is preferred because it's person-first language. It emphasizes that the individual is a person first and foremost, and that dementia is a condition they have, not a label that defines who they are. The word "demented" has negative, stigmatizing connotations.

Person-first language is a communication style that focuses on the individual rather than their medical condition. For example, instead of saying "a diabetic," one would say "a person with diabetes." It helps maintain dignity and respect.

You should avoid terms that are negative, derogatory, or infantilizing. Examples include "sufferer," "victim," "senile," "demented," "empty shell," or patronizing pet names like "deary" or "honey".

The term "patient" is appropriate in a clinical or medical context. However, for a family member or in social settings, it is often more respectful to use their name or refer to them as a "person in care" to avoid dehumanizing language.

No, you should never talk about a person with dementia with someone else if they are in the room. This is disrespectful and can be hurtful. Always include the person in the conversation to the best of their abilities and treat them with humanity and dignity.

Respond patiently and kindly, answering the question as if it were the first time you heard it. Repeating information is a common symptom of memory impairment, and reminding them they've already asked can cause shame and frustration.

While humor can be a good way to connect, avoid sarcasm or jokes that might be misunderstood. Some slang or figures of speech can be confusing for a person with dementia. It's best to stick to direct, clear, and kind communication.

References

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Medical Disclaimer

This content is for informational purposes only and should not replace professional medical advice. Always consult a qualified healthcare provider regarding personal health decisions.